Front Row - Alanis Morissette

Do
you go to the dungeon to find out how to make peace with your
days in the dungeon,
writing a letter to you didn't make me feel any more peaceful
than how I felt when we weren't speaking
because I didn't cop to what I did.
I can't love you because we're supposed to have professional
boundaries.
I'd like you to be schooled and in awe as though you were kissed
by god full on the lips.
I'm in the front row, the front row with popcorn.
I get to see you, see you close up.
I'm too tired to recount the unpleasantries one by one minute I
want to banish you the next.
I want to be on a deserted island with you along with my three
favorite cds,
ambivalent yet in your bed we've yet to acknowledge what really
happened.
Slid in to the ditch I have this overwhelming loss of ambition.
We said let's name thirty good reasons why we shouldn't be
together.
I started by saying things like "you smoke", "you
live in New Yersey (too far)".
You started saying things like "you belong to the world"
all of which could have been easily refuted
but the conversation was hypothetical.
I am totally short of breath for you why can't you shut your
stuff off ...
I'm in the front row, the front row with popcorn.
I get to see you, see you close up.
And I laughed until my lungs hurt, I love how you bust my chops.
You don't always feel seen, sometimes you feel erasable.
Unfortunately I cannot reciprocate in my current state.
I think we should be careful of how much time we spend together,
... for a while while I'm speaking you know how much you hate to
be interrupted.
Maybe spend some time alone, fill up your proverbial cup so that
it doesn't always have to be about you.
I've been wanting your undivided attention, I like the fact that
you're nothing like me.
Are you not burdened by the lack of perspective people of your
charmed life (seemingly?)
I'm in the front row, the front row with popcorn.
I get to see you, see you close up.
You never meant to be ungrateful nor held up to be whipped or
wept for certainly,
prodded at more ways than one.
Apparently you've been misrepresented dealing with the concept of
arrows
being slung towards your outrageous fortune.
Hey I'm not mad at you guardian, I'm mad at myself for spending
so much time with you
and your jeckyl and hydeness.
I'm glad I figuratively slapped you on the wrist,
you laughed a wicked laugh and said "come here let me clip
your wings!"
(I know he's blood but you can't still turn him away you don't
owe him anything)
"Raise the roof" he yelled "yeah raise the roof!"
I yelled back.
(Unfortunately you needed a health scare to reprioritize.)
No thanks to the soap box.
Having me rile against them won't make an ounce of difference ...
I'm in the front row, the front row with popcorn.
I get to see you, see you close up.
Oh the things I've done for you, many a sitch, a friend, a man's
left for you,
oh the books I've read for you, the tongues I've bitten for you,
many a new city for you, many a risk taken for you (not a single
regret).